Last weekend, I turned 31. I can’t say I loved reaching that number. For the first time, I’m starting to accept that living forever might be just outside my reach. Maybe. In any case, here’s 31 things I’ve learned from my time on Earth thus far.

In the 5th grade, I won an essay writing contest. I don't remember the topic, but it was part of the DARE program (drugs are bad, mmmmk), and I won pizza for the class. I was basically 10 year-old Jesus 😇. And many people, (sweet grandma included) said it then, and have said it since, "You're such a good writer." And thus a gorilla was born, and it's been living (rent-free) on my back ever since.